Senses

Which sense would you choose keep if you are only allowed to have one?
Sight is confined to the limits of our visual mechanism's construction. Seeing is believing? Only if you believe in the deception.
Smell...I can only think of the smell of nature and food right now. Worth forsaking you think?
Hearing..I think it is quite miserable without music and laughter.
Touch...most intimate and real to me.
Voice...our major way of communication. But I have come to realize how deceptive communication can be between people. Its all about fabrication of what you want the other party to hear. So its also deceptive...at times..

Perhaps its most happy to have goldfish memory

Pen

I guess this blog space provides me with an inhibited freedom that I cant find when I am with people in person. It is not meant to be a personal virtual diary, for I do not spell out all details.

Many are my critiques, ideas and opinions about life that I would want to share with people...not just people I know.. but random readers. Read beyond the vulgarities and you may discern certain attitudes of people in life which I find fundamentally questionable.

My honesty pens down and showcase my resilience of inquisition towards many issues in life -- something that I feel most people have taken for granted. Thus missing out fundamental nuances that I feel are the keystones to a beautiful and peaceful life.

An extremely personal touch of how my non-chalance can generate such thoughts -- to balance the growing emotional imbalance in my own private life.. a rather painstaking experience yet a consciousness that I am proud to have.

Thanks Carl for your comment (and remembering my red hair). Hope you are not suffering too much at XX...if you are still working there..haha

To all fuckers

KNN chao cheebye...what fucking comment is that? These fuckers obviously dont understand the difference between the word "comment" and "advertisement". Please kindly fuck off.

Dont you wish life is as dynamic , meaningful, all encompassing , expressive , vigorous ,and easy as we use the word f-u-c-k? Everyone uses this fucking word like fuck...but bet you fuckers have no idea where it originated from.

People has been fucking around since god knows when (duh), otherwise I wont be writing this fucking blog after a fucking day of depression and you wont be reading this fucked up blog. So when the fuck did "fuck" first appeared?

Well, it appeared coded.. due to its apparent obscenity. Where? In a poem. How romantic. When? Sometime before 1500, in a mixture between Latin and English.

'The poem, which satirizes the Carmelite friars of Cambridge, England, takes its title, “Flen flyys,” from the first words of its opening line, “Flen, flyys, and freris,” that is, “fleas, flies, and friars.”

The line that contains fuck reads “Non sunt in coeli, quia gxddbov xxkxzt pg ifmk.” The Latin words “Non sunt in coeli, quia,” mean “they [the friars] are not in heaven, since.” The code “gxddbov xxkxzt pg ifmk” is easily broken by simply substituting the preceding letter in the alphabet, keeping in mind differences in the alphabet and in spelling between then and now: i was then used for both i and j; v was used for both u and v; and vv was used for w. This yields “fvccant [a fake Latin form] vvivys of heli.” The whole thus reads in translation: “They are not in heaven because they fuck wives of Ely [a town near Cambridge].” '


So people, now you know what the pedigree "fuck" is.
We are all fucking poets, arent we?
Etymology always interests me.

Tell those fuckers who know shit about what they are saying...stop using this poetic word.
Its good to know beyond the imagery of carnal knowledge. Out.

..

..but when the closet monster is none other than your own dark nuances
..you cant tell what upsets you anymore
..you wonder if you can be happy again
..you know part of you has been lost forever..

where would my spaceship be?
will I get to say you're beautiful forever?

my forceful tears trespasses my sight once again..
I surrender my night to the stars.

please let me sleep..

fo-beer

I just woke up crying this morning. Damn...and I thought I can have more rest since I turned in early. Anyway, I came to the conclusion that I have the following phobias at the moment. Is it abonormal? I think my memories have better memories than me. For things that I have given up and have let go, my memories keep jamming it into my momentary peaceful mind.

Nostophobia
Philophobia

and of course...

Oneirophobia
Mnemophobia

They are highlighted in green because it is my favourite colour. A colour that is at once sheepishly evil and at another of warming incandescence...meaning to say like the duality in our lives...the same thing can kill or save you...

so I went to seek some psychiatric help. You know sometimes one knows that you are only dreaming while you are nightmaring, and you try to force yourself to wake up? Apparently...this is what my psychiatrist says...

"Escaping' from a nightmare by awakening only suppresses your conscious awareness of the anxiety-provoking imagery. You may feel a certain relief, but like the prisoner who digs through his prison wall and finds himself in the cell next door, you haven't really escaped." Laberge & Rheingold

So basically if a spooky monster is chasing you and you know you are dreaming...just fucking turn around and chase the monster. Or..

If you dream that you are falling off Himalayas...then make yourself fly and enjoy the scenary.

If you dream that your boyfriend/girlfriend is cheating on you...just visually strip him/her and bestow nudophobia upon them + visually implant an extra box or stick wherever applicable

Hmm ok so much for what you do IN your nightmares, heres a few habits that will help cut down on bad dreams before you head to bed..

1. Drink plain water
2. Have a little caffeine
3. Have plenty of great sex

*Does that mean I am deprived of all the above?*

OK...back to work...now this is one day/nightmare that you cant run away from.....:D a little bitching helps though..

less wire the wireless

Hmm finally got my internet up. Grabbing someone's frequency in the air ...hehe
Been writing in my head...wonder if anyone will understand..


As the dust settles,
Unfolded are my resolutions-
Of impeccable clarity.

Emerged-- neither by force nor by choice
But of cryptic subtlety--
Like shadows of fate;
Of submissive hope;
Of hopeful uncertainty.
Keeping alive, a fearful faith
That fuels a fearless front..

Why such prudence then?
Puppetish, are we not--
Bothered by such deep emotional transience
When all our destiny lay constant.

Memento Mori my dear,
If the concept of time is made for us to see that
Then magnanimous our life shall be,
And perhaps a little less painful..

For the idea of death shall render every expectation dispensable.


ok..time for milk and bed...*yawns*